My son wasn't invited to the party.
What mother doesn't get like a "lioness" if her child comes home saying that he was not invited to his friend's party? Rejection hurts, however it hurts the mother's soul more than the child's. Children learn easily and also quickly forget life's small disappointments. Have you ever stopped to think that your child not being invited to a party affects you more than him? Probably, you may have asked the following question, feeling indignant: How could so-and-so's parents not invite MY CHILD?At this moment, many thoughts run through your head: "I won't invite him to MY CHILD'S party either", "this won't go unpunished, I'll complain at school". And so on! Ideas are not lacking for mothers who love their children and take their pain as if it were their own.Who has seen or heard this phrase: "In the midst of CRISIS, CREATE". I believe that these words should always guide mothers in the upbringing of their children. Faced with the problems involving your child (and there will be many!), the focus should always be on the solution. And it is at this time that he will most need you to help him.Wasn't invited to the party? This is a great opportunity to help him develop 4 great skills that will be necessary for him throughout his life: DIALOGUE, RESILIENCE, SELF-ESTEEM, AND OVERCOMING.BUT AFTER ALL, WHAT TO DO IN THIS SITUATION?DialogueExplain to your child the reasons that may be the cause of him not having received the invitation. Say that the parents of the child are the ones who promote the party and they may have chosen to reduce expenses by inviting fewer people or the reason may be because the space accommodates a reduced number of children. Talk about how his relationship with the child is. Ask if they have affinities, if they are close.According to your child's age, guide him in a way that he understands that in life there are many people and it is impossible for all of them to like us. Instruct him by emphasizing that there are some people we love very much and even so their attitudes disappoint us.The most important thing is to make it clear to your child that he is not to blame for not having been invited. It may happen that he associates it with a type of punishment for having done something wrong, since privations usually happen for corrections.ResilienceTo define the concept, we will use an elastic band as an example. In physics, the material, when subjected to tension, does not break. It stretches and then returns to its original state. Resilience is a very important skill that must be developed in the lives of our little ones.We parents need to be creative and learn to take something positive from everything that can become a negative and even traumatic factor in our children's lives. Don't think of the fact as an exclusion, but as an opportunity to educate your child and prepare him for so many frustrating situations he will experience throughout his life.Never teach your child to distance himself from his friend or to have a vengeful position towards what happened. Encourage him to face the situation! He needs to learn to deal with unpleasant events without hiding or running away from them. This will help him a lot to become a proactive adult who will not give up in the face of life's small or big obstacles.Self-esteemWhen your child is in tears because his name was not on his friend's guest list, take the opportunity to work on his self-esteem. Show him that the focus of his actions should not be on others. Make him reflect on whether it is really worth crying and paying so much attention to this situation.Tell your child his qualities and teach him to recognize his worth. Emphasize how much he is loved and respected by so many other people around him. Help him to be self-confident and have self-respect. Explain that he does not need to please other children to feel secure and socially accepted.OvercomingThe world will not stop because your child was not invited to a party, life goes on, including your child's life. How many interesting things can he do that day and at that time? Go to the movies, have a picnic, go to the mall, play with a friend, go to the park. It can be another outing or some activity at home. There is no shortage of things to invent. Help your child to give new meaning to what seemed negative; instead of focusing on the party, make his day itself a great celebration where he is the main guest.PsychologyIf you notice that your child is a child who withdraws, is sad most of the time, and has difficulty overcoming adverse situations, it is time to consider seeking a psychologist.A specialist will evaluate him, and with the diagnosis, it will be possible to take more appropriate actions that will help him in his development process. Even if it is not serious, for prevention, it is always good to consult a doctor because, like adults, children also go through one or another more delicate moment in life.And no panic, moms! Life is like a play, and you will always be there to make your child understand that he will always be the main author of his own play! A big hug and see you in the next post!
